enter leafo's mind: III

paint me with your blood all of the words i couldve said, it never made it past my tongue ohhhh, ill point a gun to my head and nows the chance to tell me everything before i end up dead just wanna know if youre alright the way you looked at me i might be overthinking, its unhealthy i bet you think about me all night everything inside tells me youre the one i like wish you could see the way i see you in my own eyes are you alright? are you alright? baby are you alright? and i dont think ill make it out alive but even if you asked, i wont oblige im sorry i dont have what youre looking for im sorry i dont have what youre looking for turned against me with all your friends i might just say it twice, ill say it again and now i see you in his shirt (are you srs?) i made a tapestry of my own curse

wrote you letters in october but you read it in may tried to tap you on your shoulder but you pushed me away wanna run to your place, but im a little too late i dont know what you want me to say we fell inlove at 14 but i dont think that youre the 1 4 me we fell so deep at 14 but i dont think that youre the 1 4 me not the 1 4 me 14 but i dont think that youre the 1 4 me we fell so deep at 14 but i dont think that youre the 1 4 me not the 1 4 me you said it was nothing, but im not blind i saw the way you looked at him when he walked by but when i did the same, somehow im the bad guy? i wanna mess wit ur head like u did wit mine and then you swear you felt it coming still you kept on running stared at him too long and said your heart meant nothing claimed that you were changing but you were just bluffing mad i found somebody guess that makes us nothing gave you my heart at 14 but i dont think that youre the 1 4 me we fell so deep at 14 but i dont think that youre the 1 4 me not the 1 4 me 14 but i dont think that youre the 1 4 me you were way different at 14 but i dont think that youre the 1 4 me not the 1 4 me we fell inlove at 14 but i dont think that youre the 1 4 me we fell so deep at 14 but i dont think that youre the 1 4 me not the 1 4 me 14 but i dont think that youre the 1 4 me we fell so deep at 14 but i dont think that youre the 1 4 me gave you my heart at 14 but i dont think that youre the 1 4 me we fell so deep at 14 but i dont think that youre the 1 4 me not the 1 4 me 14 fourteen fourteen yuh we were fourteen fourteen

geh its a quarter past ten, can we meet again? got things i wanna say but i dont think youd hear the end like where were you when i needed you, it just dont make no sense but who am i to act on it, im no longer in your head cuz what are you looking for? i thought i was all you wanted now you dont know who you are cuz what are you looking for? i thought i was all you wanted now im the one you ignore i know im still on your mind (mind) when you see the stars at night (night) and you know that you cant hide (hide) i just hope we coincide (coincide) 2 years ago when you were looking at me you whispered "i love you" when we were in the backseat remember those promises where you said youre mine? now youre with him like what the fuck was the point? if you saw it, in my eyes i was dying when you werent there i wasnt ready for goodbyes but i dont think you seemed to care did you think i forgot what you said? cant believe i cried over you now you just left me in dread would you believe i wouldve died for you

part I here we go again, you never try to speak then ill end up chasing you right down the street leading on myself, dont know what to believe all the doubt i dealt before my soul depletes but do you know just how it feels? to be ignored like im not there when everyone just turned their backs on you and so i bottled up my tears looked my way but i dont think she wants to talk to me, and i dont think she even thought of me, but id feel better if you talk to me, could you talk to me? bones now left to rust, consuming every part right from my lungs, and im slowly losing all my fuckin trust, cuz everything i did was all for what? was all for what? why cant yall show me that yall ever care? like when i just try to talk, its like yall are never there and i dont even really wanna compare but the shit i do for yall, its like yall are never fair like what the fuck? i noticed that every word feels hopeless am i a burden cuz it hurts that we just turned to strangers but yall— looked my way but i dont think they want to talk to me, and i dont even think they thought of me, but id feel better if yall talk to me, could yall talk to me? bones now left to rust, consuming every part right from my lungs, and im slowly losing all my fuckin trust, cuz everything i did was all for what? was all for waahahaha fuck part II and then youre pulling me apart in pieces while im at my worst then you gave your reasons our spot is where you left me bleeding and you shushed my mouth when you were speaking like good for you, you found your worth but why did you just make it worse? left me bleeding by the trees and you apologized but do you really mean it? dnd, on a dinner with death and i told him all about your regrets im not the one you deserve i bet just sucks cuz youre the one i wanted and now youre pulling me apart you tore my limbs and took my heart and now im seeing who you are and now im seeing who you are and then youre pulling me apart in pieces while im at my worst then you gave your reasons our spot is where you left me bleeding and you shushed my mouth when you were speaking like good for you, you found your worth but why did you just make it worse? left me bleeding by the trees and you apologized but do you really mean it?

i kept that hope that maybe youd return i tried to stay no matter how it hurt i watched the clock as every second burned and then u broke me and left me on the curb i waited out until theres nothing left i waited out til my heart dont beat my chest you said some things you never really meant you told me sht that pierced right through my flesh was on my chair, you texted me "lets reconnect" i thought you hated me, thats why you fcking left you let me in again, it just dont make no sense you said you were scared of what our friends would think now youre thinking whats next? when you thought its for the best and now who would you text, when youre crying in bed? and we've been here before watched you walk out the door and i slept on the floor cant believe you wanted more i kept that hope that maybe youd return i tried to stay no matter how it hurt i watched the clock as every second burned and then u broke me and left me on the curb i waited out until theres nothing left i waited out til my heart dont beat my chest you said some things you never really meant you told me sht that pierced right through my flesh do you know what its like to dream abt this every single night? or do you know what its like to hope a different outcome every flight now youre thinking whats next? when you thought its for the best and now who would you text, when youre crying in bed? and we've been here before watched you walk out the door and i slept on the floor cant believe you wanted more

whatd you think when you finally knew? what did you imagine on what to do? ohhh-ohh-oh remember all those nights i would tell u lies it was you and i when id hide from you and what i dealt wonder how you felt letting it all melt knew you werent well and i hope that youre okay and im sorry i pushed u away they told me youre crying and up in your head and im sorry im like this, cant reciprocate to you specifically, with that being said had stopped what i felt cuz u were a defect

and i cant sleep cuz im thinking about you and the things we'd do if youre with me when youre off my mind i dont really think that i can breathe ohh-ohhhh-ohh honestly, i could talk to you for hours whisper to me, all of your favorite flowers "whats on your mind?" all i think is just about her im so shy, maybe im a fucking coward honestly, i could talk to you for hours whisper to me, all of your favorite flowers "whats on your mind?" all i think is just about her im so shy, maybe im a fucking coward oh, tell me all the things you like and tell me shit that makes you cry and i cant help but look into your eyes when you talk to me, i probably made it obvious but like i hope not cuz i really wanna be the one that you want ill wait, even if it takes so long

if you ask how i'd feel, i'd say im fine but if you ask again, id say i wish i died (but if you ask again, id say i wish i died) (but if you ask again, i might jus fucking cry) cuz theyre perfect, im hurting, cant clear up my mind theyre all one step ahead while im wasting my time writing these poems, for people that cry but i think its okay cuz ill just leave at night and i envy all my friends who seem so perfect til theyre dead who seems the type that can impress with calm patience and lessened stress and i envy all my friends who seem so perfect til theyre dead theres jus no screaming in their heads theres jus no screaming in their heads leave me dead if you hate me, i know im aware cant blend in, am i annoying? ill get off your hair sorry if i talk too much i know that you dont rly care i know that im different from my friends but please do not compare keep getting tongue-tied, hard to speak how i feel more than just one time, my emotions concealed his only son died, 50/50 ill make it real more than just one time, my emotions concealed cuz theyre perfect, im hurting, cant clear up my mind theyre all one step ahead while im wasting my time i cant keep up, u can see it in my eyes kaya potangina, i might as well just try

stupid do you know what you just did? you turned your back and burned the bridge youre such a narcissist at heart, it hurts to see you turn the way you did oh cuz how u gonna bitch and call your friends all clowns? while you got that bad energy i cant be around and then u stabbed me in the back while we were skipping towns while you paint yourself with lies you found i know for a fact youll never change i know for a fact youll never change i know for a fact youll never change i know for a fact youll never change post-chorus: mac demarco lol (stupid) now youre on your own like what you gonna do? tryna fill the void with all the things youre gonna lose heard u found urself but u the lost the ones u knew acting like u grew but theres nothing new

hallucinations of you in my room and im eating all the things that arent allowed to consume blood on my white tee from the words you've said to me hate what i have so i bathe in blood, it stained my teeth i just wanna dance in my room and i'll eat my eyes in the afternoon missing you bad now i smell your perfume ive been up and i saw the sun rise and i know its my fault and i know i lied but i hate your friends, i apologize but i dont wanna waste my time on crying so i changed your contact, i changed my phone you live nearby so i moved from home but the lights are on, you can knock on the door but this time i dont know you anymore i dont know you anymore i dont know you anymore i dont know you anymore i dont know you anymore cuz i dont know you anymore i dont know you anymore i dont know you anymore lights are open, you can knock on the door reading all the letters that you wrote me and i cried then i somehow ended js up on the floor, slept on my side missing when you talk to me, can we please meet tonight? and im losing all my grip, i lost my mind, i cant decide all of it was from my heart, what i gave you i fucked up and i know my mistakes too honestly i dont really blame you but its hard to move on when i dont hate you i dont know you i dont know you i dont know you i dont know you i dont know you i dont know you i dont know you i dont know you i dont know you i dont know you i dont know you i dont know you i dont know you i dont know you i dont know you i dont know you

yeah ik what ure doing yeah ur hurting me so ill feel dumb and its working if this shits a curse, then why am i the one thats really hurting am i that minimal to yall, why do i deserve this alimango, alimango i hear you plotting, walking, i can see you nodding saw that look you gave me when you saw i started talking would you be happy if i tore off my skin? putting me down so you can see yourself just win watch it, stop it, this is what youre causing driven by your ego ever sinced you fucking walked in would you be happy if i burn inside as my soul just lingers through your mind and youre talking more, i hate feeling compared and youre so naive, and unaware sometimes i just wanna leave you there where its cold as fuck and theres rain in the air

maybe soon enough youll understand why they left and the older you get, you'll feel a bit of resent and the friends that you'll get will either leave you impressed or prolly soon play with strings that belong in your head and sure you did it badly but i'll do it worse and it keeps on repeating and the cycle just hurts i lowkey think i lost both our favorite shirt i just wish that i could warn you about the shit i went through first and its something you shouldnt have to go through you deserve the world more than i do i hope you know all the words that i meant cuz im standing here and ill keep it direct and ill work hard for things that you only have dreamt and i hope youre prepared for the things i have felt i wish that i could be you again ill do it for you ooooh-ooh

thinking bout what i did inside my head you looked at me so differently could you rewrite the things ive said? or the things that went? or the things i did? ohhhhh, i fed the fire with my mistakes watched it burn whats left of me i told you to get away from me ohhhhh, i shouldve never had a name i messed the line you meant to say in your story you shouldve ripped the page and maybe then if i tried harder maybe id be something more you were outside with your brother and i was passed out on the floor talked down then you went your way you said some things that you didnt think and i still remember your taste no matter how much i try to drink

lift the pieces i just dropped, i know its hard to find so i sat down on the window sill cuz i started to lose my mind i was pulling on the final thread but i cant leave yall behind they helped me to learn to crawl but i just wasted their time deserve the consequences of my actions that i made and ill play it cool but ill break my bones to make you feel okay wish that i was better at meaning the words i throw when i feel scared kept my tears inside a bottle, i dont think that you care i didnt push yall away, js didnt believe in ur help i wasnt mad at you, i was just mad at myself every open hand just reminded me of guilt so i bled on their arms just to prove how i felt im doing better than my past year self but im pretty sure he was happier and everything i wrote, its on the wall and everything i wrote, its on the wall fuck that guy i hope hes dead i said i said i said i said fuck that guy i hope hes dead

mama you kept me safe under the covers even though i was really stubborn ive always loved u like a mother oh oh oh, father you gave me love just like no other youre always there so i feel covered your boy is growing, filled with wonder i got the whole world to discover where could i go when its late outside while im out on my own and i hate my cries i felt like id break if i stayed in my mind so i learned from my past and i left it all behind where would i be without the dude thats from the start we dont talk much now but we'll never drift apart where would i be without the guy with the cameras you helped with my mental and you saw the damages and to the kid with the black guitar i see myself within you and i know youll make it far my brother from another mother's from the west i hold you close so dearly in my heart thats in my chest and to my dawg, ong we tuff oh how have u not had enough and to the girl i failed to love im sorry i wasnt the one and to the dude with the urge to fight we screaming up in vc arguments every night and to the dude who helped to start it all i love you like a brother, hope you never feel as small this for the girl who felt it first sorry for who i was and how i made it worse u put up w my shit and it made u hurt u deserved to drag me thru the dirt and to the dude i was once close with we were both wrong and yea u know it i guess ill start with the approaching and im so sorry for my actions